Lisa M. - Bel Air, Maryland:
As an infant my Daughter Mollie would coo and babble, BA-BA-BA and I would say Ba-ba-ba-bubbles! Or ba-ba-ba-bath! She cooed and it reminded me to talk to her, labeling things in the world for her like bubbles and bath and book. But, Claire was so quiet. She didn’t babble or coo and over time I noticed that I was talking less and less. This is the way children learn to label milk and ball and bye-byes. I mean, this is important stuff! I knew something had to change.
Back then I started with objects and pictures but I gradually moved to picture symbols to remind me to talk. I would say, “Claire do you want to help mommy with the laundry or help mommy put her make-up on?” and present her with two picture symbols. Now, Claire understands helping with the laundry means getting a warm basket of towels dumped on her head and “make-up” time means playing with a basket of old jewelry. But taking the time to show her symbols and saying the words “laundry” and “makeup” helped her build her vocabulary.
The picture symbols helped change my behavior. Claire was still a silent little girl but now she had a talking mommy who was giving her language by talking and showing her picture symbols. The symbols, in turn gave Claire an opportunity to make a choice. She would gaze back and forth between the two symbols and then settle her gaze on her choice.
Understanding that she can choose was a huge gift. It changed everything! Once she figured this out she was on fire! She wanted to have a say in everything! She could decide what she wanted to do, who she wanted to read with or play with, where she wanted to go, what she wanted to play with, eat, and on and on….
We have a board in the car that holds picture symbols of all the places we are going to. I wanted her to know what is coming up next. It would be hard to go through life never anticipating what was coming up. I think it gave her a sense of control. And again, the picture symbols helped me remember to say the names of places and things. My silent daughter got the benefit of learning the vocabulary. As a teenager, I know she understands so much more spoken language because we made a commitment early to use visual supports like picture symbols and to do the talking necessary so she could build a rich vocabulary for her lifetime.
I know one of the old adages was that if a person could use a picture symbol to communicate they would stop trying to talk. NOT TRUE! It actually helps you identify a motivating moment or thing that a person wants and creates a real teachable moment. It also prevents behavior issues – due to not being able to express what you want.
Another thing to dispel on a voice over is this notion… “ If I give him a symbol for juice on the fridge he is just going to ask for it all day long…” But that is like saying “ If I teach him that this is called juice then he might just start saying ‘JUICE, JUICE’ all day long !” As with a speaking child, a parent will just have to say no to request when necessary – it may cause a short term tantrum but giving a child a means to speak will prevent a long term behavioral challenge.